Angels curse Women

 

Due to the state of deterioration that Christianity has suffered and their claim that Jesus freed them from the law, marital life in Christianity has become worthless, unconnected, and uncontrolled. The people of the cross believe that Islam is similar to the state of misery suffered by the worshippers of the cross.

This hadith that we are discussing comes in the context of the relationship between spouses. If the Christian woman beats her husband with a boot, the heavenly legislation in Islam has clarified the rights of the woman before the husband.

Islam has given each of the spouses rights and duties, which must be taught to them in the best possible way, so that they can perform their duties in the best possible way, and ask for their rights in a proper manner. If the husband and wife know what they have and what they owe, they have the key to peace and tranquility in their lives. These rights organize marital life and confirm good treatment between the spouses. It is good for each of them to give before they take, and to fulfill the rights of their partner by choice; voluntarily without coercion. The other must meet this kindness with better kindness, so that they hasten to fulfill the rights of their partner in full without any deficiency.

The wife’s rights :

The wife has rights over her husband that he must fulfill, and he is not permitted to neglect them. Allah the Almighty says: { And they (women) have rights similar to those (of men) over them, according to what is equitable } [Al-Baqarah: 228].

These rights are :

1- Maintenance : Islam obliges a man to spend on his wife from his money, even if she is well off. He should provide her with food, drink, housing, and appropriate clothing without neglect or extravagance. Allah the Almighty says: { Let the one with an abundance spend according to his abundance. And he whose provision is restricted - let him spend from what Allah has given him. Allah does not charge a soul except [with that within] its capacity. } [At-Talaq: 7].

He also says: { And house them where you live, according to your means, and do not harm them in order to make things difficult for them. } [At-Talaq: 6].

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) encouraged spending on one’s wife and children, as he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “ A dinar you spend in the cause of Allah, a dinar you spend to free a slave, a dinar you give in charity to a poor person, and a dinar you spend on your family – the greatest in reward is that which you spend on your family ” [Muslim].

The Prophet ( peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said: “If a man spends on his family, seeking reward from Allah (i.e. seeking thereby His pleasure and satisfaction), it is considered charity for him ” [Agreed upon].

If a woman spends from her husband’s money in the cause of Allah without spoiling or being extravagant, it is considered a good deed in her husband’s scale. Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: “ If a woman spends from the food in her house - without spoiling - she will have a reward for what she spent, and her husband will have a reward for what he earned” [Muslim].

A wife may take from her husband’s money - without his permission - what is sufficient for her, if he falls short in spending on her and her children, but she should not exceed the limit of sufficiency.” Hind bint Utbah - may Allah be pleased with her - asked the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and said: O Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan (her husband) is a stingy man, and he does not give me and my children what I take from him without his knowledge. So he, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said: ( Take what is sufficient for you and your children in a reasonable manner ) [Agreed upon].

2- Good treatment : A man must bring joy to his family, and make his wife happy and kind to her, so that love and harmony last. Allah the Almighty says: { And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good .} [An-Nisa’: 19].

The Prophet ( peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was a practical model for treating women well. He used to joke with his wives and be gentle with them. He raced Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) and she beat him. Then he raced her again and beat her. He said: “This for that” [Ibn Majah] . He also said: “The best of you are the best to their families, and I am the best of you to my family” [Ibn Majah]. The

Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said: “ The most perfect of the believers in faith are those with the best character and the kindest to their families” [At-Tirmidhi]. Lady Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to help his family ( i.e., help them complete some of their chores ), and when he heard the call to prayer, he would go out. [Bukhari and Abu Dawood].

There are forms of good treatment between spouses that confirm love and affection, which are:

- Allowing the wife to express her opinion : Marital life is a partnership between the spouses, and the man gives his wife the opportunity to express her opinion about what is going on in their home, and this is what makes life between the spouses easy and happy. A man should respect his wife’s opinion and appreciate it if it is correct, even if it contradicts his opinion. One day, the wife of Omar ibn al-Khattab stood up to discuss it with him (may Allah be pleased with them both). When he denied it, she said: Why do you deny that I discuss it with you? By Allah, the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) would discuss it with him . [Bukhari].

When the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) asked the Companions to end their Umrah rituals and return to Madinah (this was after the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah in the sixth year of Hijrah), the Muslims delayed in complying with the Prophet’s (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) order. They were saddened by the conditions of the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah and their inability to perform Umrah that year. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered upon Umm Salamah (may Allah be pleased with her) and told her what he had encountered from the people. Umm Salamah said: O Messenger of Allah, do you like that? Go out, then do not speak to any of them until you slaughter your sacrificial animal and call your barber to shave you. So he went out and did not speak to any of them until he did that. When the Muslims saw what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had done, their astonishment disappeared, and they felt the danger of disobeying the Prophet’s (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) command. They began to slaughter their sacrificial animals and shave each other’s heads, thanks to the advice of Umm Salamah.

- Smiling, being kind and being good to one another: A man should be cheerful with his family. He should not be gloomy in his home, frightening the old and the young. Rather, he should respond to his wife’s mistreatment with beautiful forgiveness and a calm smile, along with kind advice. Love will prevail as a result and anger will go away.

Mu’awiyah ibn Haidah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I said: O Messenger of Allaah! What are the rights of one of our wives over him? He said: ( Feed her when you eat, clothe her when you clothe yourself, do not hit her in the face, do not curse her (i.e. do not say to her: May Allah make you ugly), and do not abandon her except in the house )
[Abu Dawud and Ibn Hibban]. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) also said: ( Treat women well, for women were created from a rib , press here , and the most crooked part of the rib is its upper part. If you try to straighten it, you will break it, and if you leave it alone, it will remain crooked ) [Agreed upon].

3- Protecting the wife through intercourse : Intercourse is a right shared between the spouses, each of them enjoys the other, and through it the man and the wife remain chaste, keep away from immorality, and are rewarded in the hereafter. The husband has the right to fulfill this right of the wife, and to be gentle and playful with her, and the woman has the same right.

Some scholars have made an effort and said: It is recommended for a man to have intercourse with his wife at least once every four nights, based on the fact that Islamic law has permitted a man to marry four women. It is not permissible for a man to travel a long distance and leave his wife alone, longing for him and desiring him. So he should either take her with him, or he should not be away from her for more than four months.

4- Justice between wives : From the greatness of Islamic legislation, and God’s mercy to his believing servants, and to prevent temptation and the spread of immorality, and to care for widows whose husbands were martyred, and to protect Muslims, Islam permitted polygamy, and limited it to four who are under the protection of the man at one time, and the righteous woman does not prevent her husband from marrying another, if it is for his chastity, or because of an illness that has befallen her, or to care for a widow, or to confront the increase in the number of women in society over the number of men, so if a man marries more than one, he must be just between them, God Almighty said: { Then marry such women as seem good to you, two or three or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then one or those your right hands possess. Click here } [An-Nisa’: 3].

The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, warned those who do not seek justice between them, saying: “ Whoever has two wives and favors one over the other will come on the Day of Resurrection with one side of his body hanging limp. ” [At-Tirmidhi]. The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, was fair between his wives, to the extent that he would draw lots between them when he traveled. [Bukhari].

Justice between wives requires spending equally on them in terms of food, drink, clothing, housing, and spending the night with them. As for justice between them in the emotional aspect, that is something that a person does not control, as his heart may be more inclined toward one of his wives than toward the other, but this does not mean that he should give her more than the others under any circumstances.

Aisha, may God be pleased with her, said: The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, would divide his time between his wives fairly, then he would say: “ O God, this is my division in what I own, so do not blame me for what You own and I do not .” [Abu Dawud, At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasa’i, and Ibn Majah] In this regard, Allah the Almighty said: { And you will never be able to be equal between wives, even if you should strive to do so. So do not incline completely [toward one another] and leave her in suspense .} [An-Nisa’: 129].

5- The dowry : It is one of the rights of the wife over the husband, and she can take it in full, or take some of it and forgive the rest, or forgive it all, and this was mentioned in detail above.

The rights of the husband :

The man plays the role of the captain of the ship in the family, and this does not mean canceling the role of the woman, as married life is a partnership between the man and the woman, the capital of which is affection and mercy, and the man has duties to bear the burdens of life and its responsibilities, and bear its problems, and just as the woman has rights over her husband, he has rights over her, if she fulfills them, he will be happy and she will be happy, and they will live a good and honorable life. Allah the Almighty said: { And women have rights similar to those against them, according to what is equitable. But men have a degree over them . } [Al-Baqarah: 228].

Lady Aisha - may Allah be pleased with her - asked the Messenger of Allah, may Allah’s prayers and peace be upon him, and said: Which people have the greatest right over the woman? He said: (Her husband), so she said: Which of the people has the greatest right over a man? He said: (His mother) [Al-Hakim and Al-Bazzar].

The man has the right of guardianship over the woman. The woman must ask her husband's permission to leave the house, or to spend from his money, or the like. However, the husband should not misunderstand the meaning of guardianship and prevent his wife from going out if she has an acceptable excuse, such as maintaining family ties or fulfilling some necessary needs. Only a generous man honors women, and only a vile person humiliates them.

Guardianship is for the man, not the woman. The man has the ability to bear the hardships of work and the consequences of life, and he can look at things from a future perspective, so he gives priority to what should be given priority and delays what should be delayed. Allah the Almighty says: { Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given one more (strength) than the other and because they spend (for maintenance) from their wealth. } [An-Nisa’: 34].

One of the rights that a wife must fulfill towards her husband is:

1- Obedience : Islam has made it obligatory for a woman to obey her husband, unless he orders her to disobey Allah Almighty, for there is no obedience to a creature in disobeying the Creator. Allah Almighty has prepared Paradise for her if she obeys Him well. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “ If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, it will be said to her: Enter Paradise from whichever of its gates you wish .” [Ahmad and At-Tabarani].

He also said: “ Any woman who dies while her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise .” [Ibn Majah]. It was narrated on the authority of Ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) that a woman came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allah, I am the delegation of women to you. This jihad has been prescribed by Allah for men. If they are successful, they will be rewarded, and if they are killed, they will be alive with their Lord and provided for. We, the women, take care of them, so what do we have to do with that?” 2- Fulfilling the husband’s desire for sexual intercourse : A woman must obey her husband if he asks her to have sexual intercourse, to ward off temptation and satisfy desire . The Prophet , may God bless him and grant him peace, said: “ A woman comes in the form of a devil and leaves in the form of a devil. So if one of you sees something in a woman that pleases him, let him go to his wife, for that will repel what is in his heart. ” [Muslim]. The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, also said: “ If a man calls his wife to his bed and she does not come, and he spends the night angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning .” [Bukhari, Muslim, and Ahmad]. There is no obedience to the husband in sexual intercourse if there is a legal impediment with his wife, including: - If the woman is menstruating or in postpartum bleeding. - If she is fasting an obligatory fast, such as the month of Ramadan, or a vow. Or to make up for it, or to make up for it, but at night it is permissible for him to have intercourse with her, because Allah the Almighty said: { Lawful to you on the night of the fast is the approach to your wives. They are your clothing and you are their clothing } [Al-Baqarah: 187]. - That she is in a state of ihram for Hajj or Umrah. - That he has asked to have intercourse with her in her anus. What is permissible for a man from his wife during her menstrual period : It is forbidden for a man to have intercourse with his wife while she is menstruating, because Allah the Almighty said: { So keep away from women during menstruation and do not approach them until they are pure } [Al-Baqarah: 222]. It is permissible for a man to enjoy his wife in anything other than her vagina. On the authority of Aisha - may Allah be pleased with her - that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, used to order one of us, if she was menstruating, to wear a waist wrapper and he would have intercourse with her over the waist wrapper . [Muslim]. If a man has intercourse with his wife while she is menstruating, and he was aware of the prohibition, then he has committed a major sin, from which he must repent. He must also give in charity a dinar if intercourse occurred at the beginning of her menstruation, and half a dinar if it occurred at the end of it, based on the statement of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “ If a man has intercourse with his wife while she is menstruating, if the blood is red, then let him give in charity a dinar, and if it is yellow, then let him give in charity half a dinar .” [Abu Dawood and al-Hakim]. Postpartum bleeding is similar to menstruation. 3- Adorning oneself for one’s husband : A woman must adorn herself for her husband, and appear to him every day as if she were a bride on her wedding night. Types of adornment were known during the time of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), such as kohl, henna, and perfume. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

















“Use kohl, for it clears the vision and makes the hair grow .” [At-Tirmidhi and An-Nasa’i]

Women used to adorn themselves with jewelry and wear clothes dyed with saffron (a red color). The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) ordered his companions not to enter upon their wives suddenly upon their return from a journey until they had prepared themselves and adorned themselves for him. It was narrated on the authority of Jabir (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) forbade a man from knocking on the door of his wife’s house at night . [Agreed upon]

How wonderful is the image that one of the wives tells, saying: My husband is a man who collects firewood (he cuts wood, collects it from the mountains, then goes down to the market to sell it, and buys what our house needs). I feel the suffering he endures in order to earn our livelihood, and I feel the heat of his thirst in the mountains that almost burns my throat, so I prepare cold water for him. So when he came, I found him, and I had arranged my belongings and prepared his food, then I stood waiting for him in my best clothes. When he entered the door, I welcomed him as a bride welcomes the one she loves, so I surrendered myself to him. If he wanted comfort, I helped him with it, and if he wanted me, I was in his arms like a little girl who her father is entertained by. This is how every wife should be with her husband.

A woman should know the adornments that her husband likes, so she adorns herself with them and does them well. She should know what he does not like and leave them to please and make him happy, and she should be sensitive to everything that pleases him in this regard.

4- The right to ask permission : A woman must ask her husband’s permission in many matters, including voluntary fasting, as it is forbidden for her to fast without his permission. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “ It is not permissible for a woman to fast while her husband is present except with his permission, and she should not be permitted to enter his house except with his permission .” [Agreed upon] The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him ) also said: “ The husband has the right over his wife that she should not fast except with his permission. If she does, she will become hungry and thirsty, and it will not be accepted from her

” [Al-Tabarani]. It is not permissible for a woman to allow entry into her husband’s house except with his permission, nor to leave her house for no need except with his permission. On the authority of Ibn Abbas and Ibn Umar, they said: A woman from Khatham came to the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said: I am a widow (with no husband), and I want to get married. What are the rights of the husband? He said: “ The rights of the husband over his wife are: If he desires her and tries to seduce her while she is on the back of a camel, she should not prevent him. It is his right that she should not give him anything from his house except with his permission. If she does, then the sin is on her and the reward is his. It is his right that she should not fast voluntarily except with his permission. If she does, then she will become hungry and thirsty, and it will not be accepted from her. If she leaves her house without his permission, the angels will curse her until she returns to his house or repents ” [Al-Bayhaqi and Al-Tabarani].

5- Preserving his honor and money : A woman must preserve her honor and protect it from suspicion, as this pleases her husband. She must also preserve her husband’s money and not squander it or spend it in ways other than its legitimate uses, as good management is half of living. A wife may spend from her husband’s money with his permission. Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said: If a woman spends from the food in her house - without spoiling it - she will be rewarded for what she spent, and her husband will be rewarded for what he earned . [Muslim].

6- Acknowledging his favor : A man strives and works hard to provide for his wife and children, and to provide them with a peaceful and happy life, far from the humiliation of need and begging. A man protects his wife through intercourse, and spares her the trouble of facing life’s problems. Therefore, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “ If I were to command anyone to prostrate to anyone, I would command a woman to prostrate to her husband, because of his great right over her .” [Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhi, and Ibn Hibban]

The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, warned women against being ungrateful to their husbands, saying: “ I looked into Hell, and saw that most of its inhabitants were women who were ungrateful to their husbands. If you were kind to one of them for a lifetime, then she saw something in you, she would say, ‘I have never seen any good from you .’” [Bukhari] The greatness of her husband’s favor towards her is not hidden from the wife, so she should always thank and praise him, in order to be grateful to God, Lord of the Worlds.

7- Serving the husband : The Muslim wife fulfills her duties towards her husband, her home, and her children, and she is content, seeking thereby the pleasure of her Lord Almighty. Asma bint Abi Bakr used to serve her husband, Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam, may God be pleased with him, in the house, and he had a horse, so she used to take care of his affairs.

Fatima - may God be pleased with her - the daughter of the Messenger of God - may God bless him and grant him peace - used to serve in the house of Ali ibn Abi Talib, her husband, and she did not refrain from fulfilling his needs. When she asked the Messenger of God - may God bless him and grant him peace - for a servant to help her with the affairs of the house, and that was not available, the Messenger of God - may God bless him and grant him peace - ordered her to remember God when she went to bed, so she would glorify, praise, and magnify God, as this would help her with the hardship she was suffering.

And God knows best.